Fergus walked the streets of this New York City, ahh, everywhere was green and beer! These people were celebrating that Christian fool Patrick who took on the Druids so long ago. For whatever reason, his powers seemed to be growing on this day of Patty. Fergus had made a few honest folks quite questionable without even trying… At lunch his waiter suddenly turned into a fine daughter of Erin in nothing but shamrocks after Fergus muttered to himself. That was when he spotted the girls, the black haired animal in a human skin was talking to a red head with a large furry tail.
“I have to get closer and hear what these two have to say to one another,” Fergus said.
*
Penguin was sure that something was off, and not just Black Cannery or Swan’s cloths. He was sure that his staff at the Ice Berg Lounge never use to let him just call them up and bang them in the butt, much less enjoy it to the point of brain dead bliss like Swan was on his desk. Black Cannery was slowly coming back to reality by fingering her pussy after Penguin took her butt. But hay, why should he complain if all the ladies around him swooned at the mere thought of getting his fish stick in their tail pipe?
“Hay Boss?” Sterling called as she walked in the office, “Oh, Swan is the lucky bird tonight. Oh yeah, Boss Miss Huntress called in, she heading out with Mr. Dagget to entertain him for the night. She promises to have all his secretes by ten o’clock. If I come in on my day off tomorrow, can you squeeze me in?”
Oswald looked at the brunette at the door, she was trying to be coy and seductive, holding her hands behind her back, looking down and thrusting her chest out. Penguin looked at her, her bowler derby was fine, her collar and bow tie were neat and proper, her suit was clean and laced tight, her heels were the required Mary Janes, but on her fishnets…
“Miss Sterling! What is that on your knee? A broken stitch on your stockings! Report to my office at five PM for a disciplinary hearing tomorrow! I warn you, if your uniform is not perfect you will wear nothing at all!” Oswald barked causing Sterling to giggle.
“Don’t… oh… Stop…” Swan moaned from the desk as she drooled in sexual bliss.
*
“So Power Girl and Captain Marvel are ‘the brides of Doom?’ Seriously?” Laura asked Doreen.
“Yeah, and Wonder Tits, She-hulk, and Sue Storm are Deadpool’s pole dancing hench whores,” Doreen sucked on her mint milk shake.
“Leave the dimension for a few months and I might as well still be in a parallel universe,” Laura drank her Jameson’s, “Thanks a lot Doctor Strange, can I get a ticket out of here?”
“That’s not the worst,” Doreen said, “Word is the cat in Gotham has made an army of junior cat criminals to serve at her beck and call. Of course the Bat is losing his damned mind!”
“Nobody gets under the bat’s cowl like the spit curl, the clown and the cat!” Laura said, “Is it true what I heard about Thor?”
“That Amora took him to San Francisco to a gay pride event and had him give the Executioner a blow job to prove his love for her?” Doreen asked, “Naw, she lead the two of them around in leather chaps and harnesses and then had the pair of them compete in how many men they could suck off to prove their love for her. It is the number one video right now on Gay Porn sights. Hang on…”
Laura arched an eyebrow, Doreen made an odd motion as she used her prehensile tail, there was a thud from the brick half wall they were sitting on and she reached behind her and pulled up a bunch of nothing… a bunch of nothing that was squirming and seemed to weigh as much as a kid?
“Bite him Tippy-toe!” Doreen snapped.
Laura leaned back when the little squirrel with a pink bow jumped up and attacked the invisible thing and seemed to find something to bite that caused the thing to scream and turn visible again. Laura couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of the little guy in a bad Saint Patrick’s day leprechaun costume with a squirrel biting his “pots of gold.”
“Wait, how was he invisible?” Laura asked, “You aren’t just in Spencer’s gift costume are you?”
“Just what in the Bloody Hells be a Spencer’s gift costume?” the man shouted trying to get the squirrel to let go.
“Are you a good leprechaun or an evil leprechaun?” Doreen asked.
“When I get free I am going to rip your thoughts out!” the small man screeched.
“Evil,” Laura and Doreen agreed.
“Hold still,” Doreen shouted at the man, “Dang it, I wish you would just go back to what every fairy tale you came from and leave my tail alone!”
Suddenly the man vanished, Tippy-toe dropped to the ground and both young heroines stared in amazement.
“He’s gone?” Luara asked.
“Yeah, just vanished,” Doreen said reaching around in case he had escaped her grasp.
“Vanished just like you told him to…”
“I didn’t tell him to,” Doreen said, “I just said I wished he would…
“How many wishes is a leprechaun supposed to give if you catch them?” Laura asked.
“I don’t know,” Doreen gasped still looking at the spot where the thing had been, “Maybe three?”
“Three wishes?” Laura turned to her friend, “We could have used one to undo all the weird stuff happening to the heroes! And you tossed him on the first wish!”
*
The power watched the event, it mattered little, but the next agent would deal with these two most assuredly!