Bruce walked with his hands up to the grand staircase, Selina and Ana were in front of him and behind him were Echo and Enigma. Riddler stood on the landing of the grand staircase with Query who was covering the great hall with a belt fed machine gun. All around him the catering company waitresses had pulled out knives and pocket pistols and a few had pulled off their blouse and vest uniform tops to show their “Deadly Question” gang colors. Bruce watched as the teenage girls fleeced the officers and their spouses and the various large donors of wallets, jewels and what not. Riddler smiled at the three as they walked up the stairs.
*
Eddy smiled as Enigma and Echo drove Wayne and his dates up the stairs to him.
“Greetings,” Eddy smiled, “I hope you don’t mind me crashing the party. Ladies hold them over there, I want a word with Miss Kyle in privates.”
Selina stopped next to Eddy and the banister while the two ladies escorted Bruce and Ana over to the next flight of stairs about ten feet away. He then turned and smiled at Selina.
“Do you know why there are wooden pineapples on these old staircase banisters?”
“They use to use pineapples as house warming gifts?” Selina quipped.
“Eh, close enough. Been a while hasn’t it ‘Lina,” Eddy smiled, “Heard you did a tour of Canada. How was that?”
“You know,” Selina shrugged, “Did the opera circuit toured the museums, one of the security guards actually apologized for shooting at me as I made my escape.”
“Have you heard? Harley got transferred to Belle Reaves last month,” Eddy smiled.
“Great senior psycho twit getting more commando training,” Selina sighed.
“Well I would like to formally apologize for ruining your night’s work,” Eddy said.
“Yeah,” Selina looked out at the Deadly Questions robbing the cops, “You know most of those are plastic, glass, and coated stainless steel.”
“Yes, well this is sort of a charity deal by myself as well…”
“Giving your fan girls a chance to get curb stomped by the bat next to their idol?” Selina hissed.
“Think of it as a Darwinian event,” Eddy tried to smile, “This will kill any delusions about the wonderful life of as a supervillain for most of this girls and for the few who are determined to live a criminal life it will get them the needed ‘street cred’ for them to survive that life, now don’t worry an investment has already put lawyers on retainer to help them after the cops round them up and a fund has been established for their medical bills as well as scholarships for those who see the light.”
“Tell you what Eddy,” Selina eyed the red haired man, “I’ll give you a mulligan for tonight…”
“If?” Eddy prompted.
“You shave that horrible excuse for a goatee off your face.”
“That is the fifteenth comment to that effect today,” Eddy sighed, “Consider it shaved. Who is the glasses with Wayne? She isn’t the normal bimbo he takes to one of these events…”
“You still want me to scratch out your eyes,” Selina stared daggers at Eddy.
“You know what I mean,” Eddy said, “Normally when he goes full on rich fop and dates two girls at once they are matching bimbos and when he invites you it is because he wants someone classy not just pretty and rich.”
“Ah, I would have to go home to change gloves anyways,” Selina said, “Well you know how Bruce spends most of his time vacationing, chasing rich bimbos, and preening on red carpets? She is the day to day head of the Wayne charity that he stops by once a week like that Fox guy is the real head of Wayne Enterprises.”
“Curious,” Eddy said, “Lina, please send over Mr. Wayne so I can have a word with him before your boyfriend shows up.”
Selina kicked him in the shins before storming off. Bruce Wayne walked over as confused as ever.
“Ah Mister Wayne,” Eddy rubbed his shin, “Given the social nature would you mind first names?”
“Not at all Edward,” Bruce said.
“Well Bruce while we have a minute before the Bat shows up,” Eddy stood up, “I would like to ask two favors of you… Don’t look at me like that, none of them are immoral.”
“What do you want?” Bruce asked.
“Please take this and put it in your pocket, once the Bat breaks up my entertainment give it to Commisioner Gordon in your post rescue interview,” Eddy held out a green envelope with a to and from of a Question mark and a bat, “I would have given it to Gordon himself but it seems he slipped out before we locked the doors, no doubt he is setting up the perimeter to keep us from escaping.”
“It’s not…” Bruce stared at the envelope.
“No, just normal ink and paper,” Eddy smiled.
Bruce took the envelope and put it in the inside pocket of the tuxedo jacket.
“What was the second thing you wanted?” Bruce asked.
“A polite introduction I don’t believed I have met your friend before,” Eddy said, “I would be rude to not say a word or two since she has been hauled up here already.”
“OK.” Bruce walked back towards the ladies with Eddy right behind him, “Ana this is the criminal Edward Nigma alias the Riddler.”
“Freiin Anastasia Cisnarova,” the raven haired woman glared at Eddy.
“Baroness!” Eddy did a slight bow, “Are you new to Gotham? Recently of Austria?”
“Ja,” Ana said, “I recently started working here at the Wayne Foundation.”
“And this is the first time you have seen Gotham’s peculiar form of street performance in person?” Eddy beamed.
“Ja,” Ana had a hint of confusion in her voice.
“Well allow me to officially declare you a full-fledged resident of Gotham,” Eddy said, “Tell me do you like riddles?”
“Nein.”
“To bad since it is my idiom,” Eddy said, “A word of warning, not all of Gotham’s Street Artists are as congenial with their victims. Tell me what sound sends the peasant girl fleeing the ball in the fairy tale?”
“Stroke of midnight?” Selina quipped.
“Indeed,” Eddy said as beeping started emanating from his watch, “Call them out ladies.”
“Two by the skylights,” Enigma shouted.
“One by the kitchen entrance,” Query shouted.
“You should duck,” Eddy addressed Bruce, Selina and Ana before turning back to the crowds, “Light’em up!”
*
Ana had to admit that the riddler was less disgusting in person than she had predicted, but he needed a serious attitude adjustment before he would be employed by her. Most of the tween to twenty something year old girls would be overpowered and subdued by the police officers once a grenade went off or even just a window was shattered. Only the four here on the landing were real players and not pretenders. She could take out two of them before they could respond but behind her was teenager with a prison mower submachine gun and ten feet away was the woman armed with an African contract FN MAG machinegun. Either of those would destroy any soft body armor and would do a horrific amount of damage to their unprotected bodies. Before she could do anything Bruce jumped over Selina and her, forcing them to the ground and putting his body over theirs. The Staccato of machine gun fire rang out as the blonde with the MAG opened up on the skylight and bedlam broke out on the great hall. She watched the fight, it became clear that the man in the batsuit tonight was an understudy, almost one hundred percent it was Nightwing in the Batman’s suit. Robin appeared next to them as Riddler and his women scurried off. Out in the crowd she thought she saw two batgirls, one with red hair and one with blonde. Also in the crowd she spotted a pale red haired woman in a rainbow mini-dress using US Military combative to take down some of the riddle girls around her. Minutes later the S.W.A.T. team poured into the front entrance and the matter was quickly settled. Tomorrow was Saturday, and she would have much to look into.