by Shendude - 1/2/2013 2:59 PM
So, last month I started a story, "The Fantastic Four's New Mission". My initial chapter got a five rating and was extended later that day.
About a week later, I extended the extension. This chapter got a one rating and hasn't been expanded.
I'm tyring to figure out what I did wrong. As I see it there are several possibilities:
-I briefly had an M/M scene, which may have turned some people off.
-I had Franklin getting a blowjob from Val, which probably turned some people off.
-I waited too long.
-My writing isn't very good.
-The base concept is unpopular.
Would you folks mind helping me find out A: what I did wrong, and B: how I can revive the story?
by C.King - 1/8/2013 10:58 AM
I haven't extended cause I have an unreliable muse and work ethic. So yeah...
Plus I might not have voted. Give me a minute.
by Evva - 1/13/2013 8:18 AM
Being sincere, what turned me off was 3 different elements
1) Val and Franklin doing sex. Pedophilia and sex between teens below 16 years old repel me so I stopped even to check the story. Another point on that scene, they was watching their mom being fucked.
2)The whole sequence became another useless sex moment. Like there was no reason for the sex, it was..."I am bored, let make sex" and that usually is boring as the hell. Give me a plot to follow and I will be very enthusiastic about the story.
3)The 3 way sex scene. I never would imagine Ben Grimm fucking any man ass. He is the example of malehood in several aspects and mentally during years he felt himself like a monster not worthy to be saw by anyone outside of his life as a hero.
Excluding the turning off list there are some things which made me feel there was something missing on this story. The porn world which they went really must be magical, because in a matter of days made a mother lost all the motherly feelings about her
kids. That kind of behavior broke my sense of belief at this story. I suggest you think more on the reasons for the sex and the consequences of the changes than simply jump at the sex scenes.
BTW, Val is waaay more inteligent than her father and she is fucking arrogant about her brother. How she became a fuckinbot without anything on her head?
by Shendude - 1/15/2013 11:48 AM
Thanks for responding guys. Evva, you raise some good points.
Concerning Point One, I totally understand you. It was meant to be super-taboo, reflecting how completely the FF have embraced their new sexual ideology. As I see it, a hypersexualized society would not shield children from sex. I'll grant that I have a perhaps
unhealthy fascination with the idea of a boy becoming not only sexually active but sexually dominant at an early age. And yes, there's going to be incest in this story.
Concerning Point Two, could you please elaborate?
Concerning Point Three, yes Ben fucking another man is out of character. So is Sue fucking a woman, or Doctor Doom, or any of the ten thousand other out-of-character things we have these characters do on this site on a regular basis. I'm not sure what you're
trying to say with that last clause.
It was months, actually. Long enough for intelligent people to be swayed by a sufficiently attractive belief system. It's not entirely realistic of course, but I'll point you to the whole rest of this site.
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gothamalleyviper - 4/24/2015 9:53 PM
ES, love the updates, will post more next week once I have internet back.
Gorel, Will post more Windego at that time too.
ESchorcho - 4/24/2015 4:26 PM
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venkman - 4/24/2015 3:54 AM
Had forgotten how much fun Wonder Woman with a Flip was. Will definetley get my thinking cap on and try and contribite to the madness! :)
Sailor Mercury - 4/22/2015 8:47 PM
Writing a chapter for "Infinity Gem Madness" might be a few hours, but it should be up tonight.
Sailor Mercury - 4/17/2015 12:54 PM
2 story reboots and a new one should be up in the next few days
Mr.Easy - 4/14/2015 1:30 AM
Deadpool gets an infinity gem now there's an idea.
C.King - 4/13/2015 10:10 PM
Olivia Munn as Psylocke, opinion?
Sailor Mercury - 4/13/2015 11:01 AM
Working on chapters for "Infinity Gem Madness" and "Wasp's Wrath"
gothamalleyviper - 4/12/2015 1:12 AM
So Gorel and I are starting Marvel Wendigos back up, please rate and comment.
C.King - 4/11/2015 1:08 PM
What to post the ideas in the Forum. Also do you have suggestion for the Harley Infinity Gem/Wishing rock?
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